Hi! Nice to meet you!

... and just to inform you this article is about coaching, personal change, and why coaching might help you.

Are you satisfied with your current situation?

• Is it easy for you to change your life or your bad habits? 

• Have you ever had a significant change in your life? 

• Is it easy for you to overcome an old behavior and successfully set up a new behavior?

And what’s up with your New Year’s Resolutions? Are you still on track?

I am neither a psychological magazine nor a university, so let's get a little bit more personal.

Behavioral Change

I like change, change management, personal changes, life coaching & executive coaching, and that might be the reason why I like working in the coaching and change management business. 

But to be honest, change processes are normally hard work in daily life. You need to have a lot of self-control to change your daily routine and you need to focus on sustainable change.

Let's start with an example that is typical for personal change and goals!

I Like Bacon! So How Do I Lose Weight?

Let's talk about the weight loss example as it is very common and will provide you with some important insights.

How many people do you know who have failed attempts in losing weight? There are lots of people having a hard time with their weight and in most cases, they won't be a better person, when they successfully reach their goals. 

You can read so often: start small, go step by step, and all that stuff. But does that work? Is it so easy to overcome our brain? And if yes, why don't we just do it?

My weight is OK at the moment, but perhaps I would feel more comfortable if I can lose 10 pounds. But can it be a goal for me to lose 10 pounds? Remember, I still love bacon.

Losing 10 pounds is not a goal for me. I don't even have a scale. So, why should I be interested in losing 10 pounds? From my point of view, it is just a number.

For example: If my weight is 200 lbs at the moment and I want to lose 10 pounds, then my goal must be to weigh 190 lbs. But if a start doing more workouts, for example, my weight is probably going up because I will build up more muscles and muscles weigh more than fat. 210 lbs is worse than 200 lbs, isn't it? In conclusion, this is the wrong goal for me!

I was never interested in my weight or my age. To me, it’s just numbers, but that’s only my opinion and I am convinced that all views are a little bit different.

Because of the fact that we are all different, we need individual and desirable goals. If finding the right goal is hard for you, coaching could help you.

Before starting to change, you have to be aware of your goals.

• What do you want?

• What do you want to achieve exactly?

• And what shouldn't change?

If you don't answer these questions, how will you know that you have reached your goal?

And how do you measure it?

Do you remember? I don't have a scale!

For real, I am more interested in being healthy and fit and not in a number on the scale. Looking back to the heading "I like Bacon", the question arises if I should reduce the amount of bacon I'm eating.

To be honest, I eat bacon a lot and I won't stop doing this. But I still want to live healthier and fitter, so I must do more workouts. And I already started doing this. So, my challenge is to stay focused and keep doing workouts. Just to mention that, I use coaching techniques, too. Why? It just helps to focus on specific thoughts.

If you like to change your behaviors, start focusing on your goal. And if you are not able to do that on your own, you should start looking for a trustworthy Life Coach, Career Coach, or Executive Coach and figure out what your desired goals are.

At the end of the article, you will find an overview of the important aspects of successful change. 

Setting The Right Goals!

Changing a current behavior means that we must figure out which aspects are important to reach our goals. We need to understand the aspects that motivate us, we need strategies for success, we need to be aware of the risks, and we need techniques to reach the desired outcome.

What Is Your Focus?

If your focus is to lose weight, then it could be that change is hard. But the same will happen if your focus is to become more fit and stay healthy. In both ways, you need a major reason for the change.

This major reason must also be important for your emotional side, and you need to set up a process regularly. Most people won't start changes if they don't understand "What's in for them".

What's In For You?

When you answer this question, you will understand that it helps you to focus on different aspects of your behavioral change.

First, it helps you to clarify your goals. And for real, you should only focus on goals that are helpful for your personal development.

Second, if those aspects matter to you, they will always relate to your emotions. So, if your emotions or your gut feeling are telling you something else, it might be a good idea to take a break and think it over.

Third, focus on the Why! 

• Why do you want to have that change? 

• Why is it so important for you? 

If you don't have answers to the why, then it will be very difficult to stay motivated.

Before you start changing yourself, let's talk about some strategies.

Strategies

As I told you, my goal is to live healthier and fitter. That is my goal. But that doesn't mean that I can reach my goal. I studied coaching and change management, so I have a great knowledge of the theoretical background, the strategies needed, and the motivational aspects. 

On the other side, my mindset was built up by the habits of my family, friends, and all aspects of my life. I often think about different options for success and what elements might be useful for my personal development. So, a lot of questions come up to my mind:

• Do I have the knowledge, the understanding, and the abilities to live a life in that way?

• Might it be a good way to focus on different stages to progress?

• Do I need feedback from different people?

• Do I have to train a specific ability?

• What are the barriers and risks on my way to success?

• Should I focus on small changes or big changes?

• Could it be a good idea to explain my behavior change to my family or to the people who are important to me?

• How do I judge myself when making a mistake? Do I learn from it, or will I blame myself?

• What will I do when I accomplish my desired goal?

Talking about strategies can sometimes sound a little bit complicated. But you aim on reaching your specific goal. And that is what helped you to keep reading. It is your desire for change and your motivation!

Perhaps you have tried a lot of times to reach your goal in the past and maybe you've always failed. It is never easy to change your behavior or to improve your ability.

But I am convinced that you can change and that you can achieve your desired goal.

Your Personal Change Strategy

Maybe you are convinced about strategies and maybe you are not. I still believe you need a personal change strategy that helps you to achieve your goal.

In easy words "Let's create a plan for you!"

Let me give you an example:

At the moment, I am doing a lot of workouts. I'm exercising 4 to 6 times a week and I'm enjoying it at the moment. But what will happen when things change? 

• How often will I exercise when my job is getting busy or when I have to spend more time with my family?

• How can I integrate my exercises into my daily life? 

• Will it be ok for me if I'm doing just three workouts in the future?

It is always a good choice to think about these aspects before you start your change. 

A Plan For You

• Goal - Integrate your desired goal

• Timeframe - What do you want to achieve at which time? Try to break everything down into small steps. What can you achieve in one day, in one week, in two weeks, in one month? And, when do you start your change journey?

• Development - How do you measure your development? Scale? Feedback? How often occurred a specific habit?

• Feelings - How do you feel about your development? On a scale from 1 to 10 (10 is best) how satisfied are you at the moment? What can you do to get one or two levels up?

• Measures - What will you do on which specific day? 

• Commitment - Are you committed to your plan? If not, change it! It is your plan!

• Visibility - Where is your plan? When do you see it?

All these aspects are resources for your personal development that will help you to achieve your goal. But to stay on track and reach your goal, it is important to stay motivated. 

Motivation

Motivation is a key aspect of being successful and reaching your goals. But how can you identify aspects of your motivation, and is it possible to sense if a specific habit motivates you?

Identifying your motivation means having a personal understanding of your needs, values, and goals as that aspect will define your way of acting in a specific manner. The way we want to achieve our goals is influenced by the upbringing we received as children, our personal prior experiences, our personal needs, and our value system.

The mixture of those aspects influences our motivation.

Motivation can be subdivided into intrinsic motivation (our personal and internal values, goals, and beliefs ...), extrinsic motivation (external aspects like money, recognition, and feedback ...), and family (motivation by the desire to provide for your loved ones).

Self-Awareness & Mindfulness

Do you understand your feelings and emotions? Do you think you have a high self-awareness? If you understand why you are acting in a specific way, it will be much easier for you to change. That means you should start your change journey and reflect on yourself and why you're acting in specific ways. But let's be honest. Doing that on your own is extremely hard. Even in a coaching process, it could take some sessions to understand the trigger points and the ways of changing. 

Self-Awareness & Mindfulness help you to discover your habits but changing means always acting differently.

What Exactly Does Successful Behavior Change Mean?

From my point of view, it means that you have had a goal in the past which you have finally reached. 

Congratulations! 

You have finished your change journey.

For all others, who are still on their way or didn't start their change journey yet, let's talk about change and how you can be successful. I am convinced that I can support you in your change process and offer you a lot of different resources to achieve your goal. And Coaching might be the perfect way for you to change. 

In A Nutshell

Those six aspects will guide you in your effort of changing your behavior and begin a different life.

• Goal/Goals - What do you want to achieve exactly?

• Focus - What's in for you?

• Strategies - What's your plan? What are your next steps? When do you start?

• Plan - Your personal change plan

• Motivation - What motivates you and what can you do to avoid barriers?

• Celebrating success

If you have any questions, feel free to contact me.

harald@griffox.com